Kauai 2013 travel blog


Day 2 - April 21, 2013

Hawaii is three hours behind California. So it came as no surprise to me that when we woke up at 6AM, Hawaii time, it didn't feel early to us at all. (In fact, I'm normally up at 6AM anyway, even on the weekends). The sun was starting to rise, so I suggested we walk out on to the beach and enjoy the Kauai sunrise.

Except...

The weather was still shit. Very cloudy. That's okay. Even when it's cloudy and rainy, it never really gets cold here because of the humidity. So we walked along the beach for a little bit. Supposedly, the beach adjoining our resort is rife with sea urchins, or as sushi connoisseurs like to call, it, uni. Cathy wants to me go out and catch some uni because unit (or at least the uni roe inside) can be eaten directly from the sea, and its freakin' delicious. (It's also super expensive in sushi restaurants).

But then it started raining, so went inside to eat breakfast. We looked online and learned that the rain was going to persist, on and off, all day. Shit.

Cathy figured this was as good a time as any to get a pedicure. I passed the time in Starbucks chatting with a friend online until they started playing Mumford and Sons, which I think was a ploy to get me to leave. It worked. I don't know who this Mumford person is, but I hate him, and his sons, and if he ever has grandkids, I'll probably hate them too.

The rain let up for a little bit, so I took advantage of the lull to get some pool time in. The pool is awesome. I discovered that it also has several waterfalls and mini-caves underneath the waterfalls. The pool is not heated, which bothers Cathy, but not me. The cool water is a nice break from the humidity.

Then it starts raining again, so back inside we go.

Resigned to the fact that this is not going to be a good day for pool lounging, beach-combing, or swimming, we start looking for rainy day activities. It turns out there is a Canadian female acoustic folk-rock duo named Dala playing at the Kauai Community College Performing Arts Center, in Lihue. Tickets are reasonably priced, so we head out to Lihue.

I had never before heard of this band Dala, but I was very impressed. They sing Simon & Garfunkel-esque harmonies, except they perform (mostly) their own songs. They met in music class in high school, and they have been performing together ever since (about 11 years). Most acoustic folk-rock turns me off because I've found that "folk rock" is usually code for "I'm not really all that musically talented, so I'll try to make up for my lack of music skills by writing emotionally overwrought songs, all of which have the exact same melody", but

these women had serious vocal talent and good stage presence. The show was made even more enjoyable by the fact that the seating was General Admission, so we got to sit in the second row. I recently went to a concert where our seats were practically in the last row, and I couldn't see the performers (because everyone in front of me was standing up for the entire show) and it greatly diminished my enjoyment of the concert.

By the time the concert was over, it had stopped raining, and we weren't that far from Poipu, which is a major resort area in Kauai, so we decided to drive there and see what the beach was like. Poipu seems like the opposite of Kapaa, where we are staying. Whereas Kapaa seems like an area where Hawaiians actually live, Poipu is entirely a tourist enclave. All the major (expensive) hotel corporations have properties on Poipu beach. None of them are as nice as where we are staying, but Poipu does have an absolutely stunning with soft sand and is perfect for swimming.

We had dinner at "Puka Dog", which serves Hawaiian style hot dogs: A polish sausage encased entirely in a soft Hawaiian egg-bread roll, with mustard and fruit relish. Then we found a general store that sold "Buttery Nipple" shots in packs of four. What man can resist the lure of a buttery nipple? So I bought the pack of four shots and took them to a table for Cathy and me to imbibe.

Now, if you went to college, you probably spent at least a little bit of your time drinking alcoholic beverages, and you probably consumed a few of those silly drinks with ridiculous names that are served in shot glasses at all of your finger college-area drinking establishments. You know what I'm talking about. Drinks like "Sex on the Beach", "Dead Mexican's Ass" "Prairie Fire" and "Blow Job". "Buttery Nipple" is obviously part of that same class of beverage. And if you've ever consumed one or more of these sexually-themed drinks, you know that there's only one proper way to drink a beverage in a shot glass called a "Buttery Nipple". You're supposed to put the shot glass on the table, and then lean forward, without using your hands, and open your mouth wide enough to encircle the entire shot glass, and then pick up the shot glass with your mouth and swallow the drink.

Cathy, however, was not privy to this knowledge. (To which all I can say is that the Information Science department at UC Irvine, while it may be great at teaching important computer skills that are extremely valuable in the job market, is nevertheless letting its students down)

"That's a 'frat boy' way to drink!"

"Well, we're not exactly drinking 15 year old single malt Scotch. It's called a 'Buttery Nipple'. This drink exists for no other purpose except to provide an opportunity for hilarious sexual innuendo."

"No way I'm doing that"

I refuse to drink something called a "Buttery Nipple" as if I were sipping fine cognac. So I showed her how it was done. I don't mean to brag, but Jenna Jameson has nothing on me.

It was dark when we got back to the condo. But it was still humid and not raining. I saw it as an opportunity to get some more swimming in. It would be really nice to swim in the sunlight sometime soon.

Tomorrow, we have to wake up early because we're taking a Catamaran cruise to the Na Pali coast, which is supposed to be absolutely spectacular. Let's hope the weather improves.



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