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El Salvador and Beyond - The Griswolds Strike Again

Let the Games Begin! Jul 10, 2010

The big day his here, but first we had to have a real southern country breakfast. Janice, our hostess came out with our grits, scrambled eggs and bacon, biscuits with jam (actually a very light form of scone), juice and tea/coffee, The look on John's face to see this huge dollop of grits on the plate with his eggs and bacon was priceless. Grits is basically ground up corn (a little coarser than what we know as semolina) cooked with butter and salt and is used to complement the flavour of other food. Myself, I would have preferred it with milk and sugar, but hey - when in Rome and all that. I was complimented by the hostess as I had "a happy plate" i.e empty but John thought he was going to the naughty stairs or something because he only ate a little of his. Not an unpleasant experience but John just doesn't "do" cereal of any kind. He later admitted that he really really craved a cigarette at the time so the grits was a poor second. He is doing OK with his nicotine patches - now 2 weeks behind him. Time to head off to Boat Ramp Road (very aptly named I might add - it lead straight to the boat ramp). The crowds were already amassing as we arrived. They had the traditional lighting of the games torch - a stack of Budweiser beer cans on a pole with a gas cylinder attached! I know this event is a tongue in cheek charity event, but I did not expect so many of the real thing to turn up. Never seen so many naked protruding bellies hanging over shorts, tattooes by the dozen, missing teeth, and that is just the women!!!! This is going to be fun - I just know it! Had a walk around the arena where there were dozens of barbecue stalls selling foods of all sorts (yes John had a corn dog). Never seen so many huge barbecues either. Some almost as big as a horsefloat (no kidding). Time for the first event to begin - the toilet seat toss. One of the contestants was actually a reporter on behalf of Channel 9 Australia's Today show. She had mentioned the games to her producer and Australia said to fly her down for the games to cover them. She bombed out unfortunately but we spoke with her later to let her know there were at least 2 fair dinkum Aussies there and the next thing we know - we are being interviewed for the Today Show - so keep an eye out folks if you are around in the mornings - you may just see two of Australia's rednecks on TV back home. Next on the agenda some really bad singer so we took a walk around the food vans again for another look. Got invited by one of the candidates for the forthcoming Georgia State elections to go to a show at the local theatre tonight to sing a local lad who's "done good". Didn't pick up the tickets later on though!!! Good, the crappy singer had finished and time for the armpit serenade where the contestants had to make music with their hand under their armpits. Small lineup in this event. First up was a young boy Aubrey about 7 years old. He belted out a great tune not even running out of puff then proceeded to do the same from behind his knee. The other contestants didn't have a show beating this young man, he was a definite crowd favourite and there were calls of "do it agin" before he was declared the outright winner and received his trophy with a squashed beer can on top. By now, we are starting to melt. The temperature has got to be over 100F again only relieved now and again by a slight breeze off the river. I named it the no swimmin' hole because there are signs saying that everywhere - exception for today I guess. By this time both John and myself looked like two wilted flowers - despite drinking almost 3 litres of Gatorade between us in two hours. We could not stick around any longer and regrettfully had to leave the Games before the mudflop, pig trotter bobbing and hubcap tossing. An pity because I think they would have been equally entertaining but we risked heat stroke by staying any longer. On our way out we came across three of Dublin's finest police officers, resplendent in their shorts, yellow t-shirts, guns etc. To those familiar with our Aussie Bargearse - he is a mere shadow of these men. Headed back to our room to cool off and recuperate from the heat. Chilled out night in our room watching a bit of tv and relaxing.

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